Sometimes those totally unexpected moments can really throw me a curve ball.
Do you ever wonder why we experience certain encounters? Well, we were out at a restaurant for dinner with my parents last night...celebrating my birthday You will never guess who served us our salads…it
was my daughter's birth-mother. She served me, then she served my husband and I
did a double take…all 3 of us did double takes. It was obvious, we were
all totally shocked. After she left, my husband and I made a quick glance at
each other...as if to say, ”Is that who I think it was?” Sure enough...it was her. I went into panic
mode….wow. I was sure I’d need a defibrillator soon. We had not
seen her since our daughter was 16 months old.
A bit later, she came back and crouched down and whispered into my husband's ear (out of our daughter's sight). She did not want us to make us feel uncomfortable and wondered
if our daughter might be ready to meet her. After she walked away, we then told our daughter that her
birth-mother was there as a waitress and asked if she might want to meet her later. (We have been very honest with her, sharing bits and pieces
of her story as she is ready or when she asks.) She was hesitant and
began processing with us about what she would talk about with her. At
first she was open to the idea but still seemed hesitant. It was very interesting…as she finished her meal, she then climbed up into my
lap. She was very quiet (so unlike her!) and just colored like
crazy. I just held her tight…and she never smelled or felt so good to me.
Then she said, “Daddy and Mama, I really don’t think I’m ready to meet
her.” We absolutely did not push and said, “That’s totally fine, honey.” So, we left it at that.
So, when we
finished dinner and were leaving, my husband explained that it is not time to meet yet. Her birth-mother fully understood and showed a great deal of maturity. As I walked out
alone, I walked up to her and gave her a hug. We small talked about life and about how things are going. It was so strange to look into my daughter’s
birth-mother’s eyes once again. And, I told her we would continue to send
pictures and letters 1-2 times a year. It was extremely surreal…like a strange
dream…and a time warp. I was overwhelmed with memories.
In the car, my daughter asked me what her birth-mom and I talked about. So, I told her. Then,
amazingly, she said, “I looked up at that waitresses name tag and saw her name. I said to myself, well…that must be her.” She doesn't
miss one…thing. Wow.
Life encounters
are just so strange sometimes. It certainly was not how I expected
to spend my birthday dinner...and I questioned myself if I could have handled it differently or better. What do we do with those moments in
time? My best friend so eloquently summed it up like this: "Your daughter encounters her birth-mother...and your daughter crawled into her mother's lap to feel safe and secure. What an incredible birthday gift to you." Indeed I most likely would have experienced much anxiety if this moment had been planned in advance. This was how it was meant to be. I must believe God had a purpose and a plan for this encounter. I am still processing it all.
This continues to be an incredible journey. What an awesome birthday present...having my daughter crawl into my lap.
 |
| God once again reassures me that she is in His hands September 28, 2014 |
No comments:
Post a Comment